I had the privilege of growing up with my grandparents. I learnt from my grandmother at a very early age, during disciplinary sessions that the Word of God in Proverbs 18 verse 22 which says “He who finds a good wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord” must be my watch word as a woman.

Whenever I would play pranks or refuse to do house chores, I would not only get a taste of the rod, I would always get a lecture on why l must learn to cook, clean and be a considerate and responsible woman. Granny never failed to drum it into my head that I would someday to be a wife, and that she wanted me to grow up to be a good wife that would be a blessing to her husband and children. She never forgot to enumerate the different ways God would favour my husband and my home if I am a good wife.

Growing up with that belief, I made up my mind that I will be a blessing to my husband when God eventually gives me my Mr. Right. Finally getting married made me realize the true meaning of Prov.18:22.

 

I have come to understand that to be a blessing to my husband, I have to encourage, support and cheer him on in his quest of achieving his God – given purpose in life. It requires hard work and dedication on my part even when it is not convenient for me. I realize that one of the ways I could do this, is by being his friend and playmate.

"A good friend is like a bra ... it is close to your heart and always there for support." Funny, but it has a ring of truth.

I’ve heard different responses to the question on what makes a good friend. The most common responses include unconditional love and acceptance, mutual respect, being a confidant, a willingness to enjoy the other's activities even when it's not your favorite.

Personally, I believe that a lasting good friendship is the result of hard work and deep commitment.

When I look at all that makes a good friend, my husband of 15 years, who I fondly call “Baby Boy” or “Mellyx-My-Milk”, as my mood dictates, ranks as my closest friend. In fact he is my “BFF” – My Best Friend Forever! Through the years, I have been discovering more ways and opportunities to strengthen our friendship, and believe me; opportunities never cease nor fail to come up.

Today, I will let you into one of such little opportunities that turns into great intimate bonding moments for my BFF and I.

I never have a natural interest for cartoons. My husband enjoys watching cartoon and anything kids and finds it very relaxing. Rather than torture myself hearing his happy and excited laughter watching Yogi bear or Phineas and Ferb while I’m in our bedroom watching Oprah or Greys Anatomy, I simply crawl to him, sit at his feet and try to find the fun in yogi bear! As I sit at his feet and rest my head on his lap, I suddenly find myself getting captivated by the cartoon and laughing with him and we always end up…

My BFF loves Cartoon, so I’ve chosen to embrace this activity, among his other activities, as his life companion.

Recently, after dinner one evening, he was about to watch an episode of Zack and Cody he had pre-recorded and asked me to come sit with him and watch it with his familiar remark of “If you watch this you will always want to watch Disney channel”. I could not imagine me, Mama Howard, sitting down on my own any day and actually tuning to Disney channel! My commitment to join his world prompted me to make a good effort.

Wow! He did not only over-sell the “Zack and Cody” appeal, it captured my attention for days! Its humorous message salted our conversations for a while.

My decision to join his activities affirms my commitment to my BFF and deepens our friendship. It is well worth the time and energy because his daily favourite words to me - “Honey, you are a blessing to me” are words that touch the core of my heart and always make me go the extra mile, even at my inconvenience, to put a smile on his face and to hear his joyful laughter.

I know you’re probably wondering about his commitment to me. Well, we’ve had this ongoing debate for 15yrs on why he believes he loves me more, and why I am convinced that I love him more. Maybe if you compare this to one example of his commitment to me, then you will help us decide…

…till next week, put a spark in the eyes of your spouse!